shelby

New tattoos! (Taken with instagram)

Sat, 04 Feb 2012 17:12:29 -0500

New tattoos! (Taken with instagram)

I’ve learned that you can keep going long after you can’t.

Wed, 11 Jan 2012 05:22:32 -0500

Well it has been awhile since I’ve updated. There’s so much in my life that has happened that I don’t think I could even type that much. What I can say is I now notice how much things can change in a year. Losing people you love, gaining people you trust, and getting closer to the person you want to become. I’ve never regret anything I have ever said, but I have regretted one thing I’ve never said. I changed that the other night and finally said it. I was honest and upfront. I didn’t hold anything back and said it how it was. It felt like a huge weight was lifted off my chest. Even though it didn’t change anything about the circumstance it felt good to know I will now never regret not saying the things I did….I’ve just never been good at this right timing thing.

Anyways, this is just a little update to let you know I am alive and living. My life is moving onward and so am I.

Austin wiff muh loves (Taken with instagram)

Fri, 04 Nov 2011 16:03:13 -0400

Austin wiff muh loves (Taken with instagram)

Night time dreams. (Taken with instagram)

Wed, 26 Oct 2011 01:49:30 -0400

Night time dreams. (Taken with instagram)

Taken with instagram

Mon, 10 Oct 2011 15:38:16 -0400

Taken with instagram

Beetle juice beetle juice beetle juice (Taken with Instagram at...

Sun, 09 Oct 2011 12:24:14 -0400

Beetle juice beetle juice beetle juice (Taken with Instagram at Urban Outfitters (Northpark))

10 mins (Taken with instagram)

Wed, 28 Sep 2011 20:24:10 -0400

10 mins (Taken with instagram)

Sing me to sleep

Wed, 28 Sep 2011 02:33:47 -0400

Sing me to sleep

Hello Dear Friend;

Wed, 28 Sep 2011 01:00:21 -0400

In today’s society we all have that “perfect image” stuck in our heads. You can blame it on magazines, TV shows, or movies, but I seem to believe we make it up all on our own in our head. Don’t tell me you haven’t looked at another person and just for a second wish you had something of theirs. Maybe their smile, their hair, their clothes, or the love they have. I feel like today’s world most of us are chasing after something we created in our mind that is so hard to get its almost impossible.

I haven’t wrote in awhile because life has been pretty busy. As many of you know I work for Pacsun, and have been for the past three years. I started off as just a sales associate going above and beyond to prove to people how dedicated I am. I think about it now, and I have no real reason why I did that. I wasn’t certain I wanted to go into fashion yet I was just happy to have my first job. I have worked my way up all the way to management being blessed to do so many things for this company in and out of store. Unfortunately Saturday will be my last day with this company. No one understand how hard this is for me. I am leaving everything I know, everything I have dedicated myself to for three years to start new. I am going to a different company that is totally different in operations, and I will not be going as management. I keep getting told I will do great, and don’t worry, but I am. What if I’m not great what if i’m not….them. This all related back to what I was saying previously. Why do I think that? I mean I haven’t gotten to where I am today with my good looks? hah Anyways what I am basically trying to say is that I’m excited because moving forward I will be going out of my comfort zone, I will be challenging myself with how I adapt to change, and growing as a person. I can’t keep letting images of what I want to be getting the best of me. I have to believe in myself and show who I am, and go with it.

This might seem all jubbled up, but I think about a lot of stuff daily I just really never know how to put it down. I wish I had a tape recorder for my thoughts.

"That moment when you are so scared for what’s going to happen"

Wed, 14 Sep 2011 02:25:28 -0400

“That moment when you are so scared for what’s going to happen”

- you feel it turning your stomach into knots.

hiii(:
i just found your blog & i really like it. just everything about it actually, haha. i hope you dont mind me asking , where youre from& your favourite band?

Wed, 07 Sep 2011 03:44:45 -0400

Sorry for the late response I barely have time to check this anymore, but I am from Dallas TX, and I actually don’t have a favorite band. I really enjoy listing to True Widow while going to sleep. Look them up their from dallas as well.

It's been a while;

Fri, 19 Aug 2011 01:31:01 -0400

Since I last updated. I am never on here anymore since I have no time. School is about to start back up soon and tomorrow starts tax free. It’s going to be an interesting two weeks ahead of me.

Anyways I wanted to talk about something that happened to me today. I got judge for tearing up because I took my mom to the airport and dropped her off to go on a vacation. Yes I cried and yes I teared up later in the day when everyone asked where she was. I got laughed at and judge because I was tearing up over my mom leaving. To me this just upsets me more. Not for the fact I got laughed at but why. I teared up because it’s the first time my mom has really just left me. Not going with anyone but herself. I cried because I know I was going to miss her. A mother and daughter bond is beyond the most beautiful thing in my eyes. I am sadden for the fact I got laughed at for this. I know so many of my friends who hate their mothers, who can’t stand being around them and just talk trash about their mothers. I am not one of them and nor will I ever be. I am lucky enough to have such an amazing mother as I do. I really do think god blessed me. Of course we fight and we get angry at each other, but nothing will ever tear us apart. My mom is my bestfriend, my mom is my safety blanket and my shield of armor. She is the one I run to when I have had a bad day, and she just sits there and hold my hand. My mom truly is the most amazing woman I have ever met. I know I am going to be 20 soon and some people may call me “pathetic” or a “baby” because I cried. You know what? Judge me. Laugh at me. Call me all the names in the book, but at the end of the day you will be the one I feel sorry for; For you do not understand the bond I have with my mother, and the undying love, caring, and compassion we share.

With that said I have the connection not only with my mom, but with my daddy as well. I will always grateful to have the support I do. As long as I have them….go ahead and laugh, judge, and criticize me.

"I’m sorry I can’t be good enough for you,"

Thu, 21 Jul 2011 00:27:03 -0400

“I’m sorry I can’t be good enough for you,”

- but I am just being who I am.

Days Off Goes As Followed;

Wed, 20 Jul 2011 13:34:20 -0400

shitthathappensatnight:

Some days the best thing to do is lay around, enjoy the scenery, go for a late night drive, and just think. Sometimes that can just be the best things for you.

"These days it’s hard to figure out"

Tue, 12 Jul 2011 23:38:25 -0400

“These days it’s hard to figure out”

- what wrong from right.

Night Lights;

Tue, 12 Jul 2011 23:37:52 -0400

Happiness is a mental state of well-being characterized by positive emotions ranging from contentment to intense joy.

It’s always the little things in life that will remind you what happiness truly means.

What I've learned.

Mon, 27 Jun 2011 02:27:13 -0400

What I've learned.:

rachel-k:

I’ve learned that you cannot make someone love you. All you can do is be someone that can be loved. The rest is up to them.

I’ve learned that no matter how much I care, some people just don’t care back.

I’ve learned that it takes years to build up trust, and only seconds to destroy it.

I’ve learned that it’s not what you have in your life, but who you have in your life that counts.

I’ve learned that you shouldn’t compare yourself to the best others can do.

I’ve learned that you can do some thing in an instant that will give you heartache for life.

I’ve learned that it’s taking me a long time to become the person I want to be.

I’ve learned that you should always leave loved ones with loving words. It may be the last time you see them.

I’ve learned that you can keep going long after you can’t.

I’ve learned that we are responsible for what we do, no matter how we feel. That either you control your attitude or it controls you.

I’ve learned that heroes are the people who do what has to be done regardless of the consequences.

I’ve learned that money is a lousy way to keep score.

I’ve learned that my best friend and I can do anything or nothing and have the best time.

I’ve learned that just because someone doesn’t love you the way you want them to doesn’t mean they don’t love you with all they have.

I’ve learned that maturity has more to do with what types of experiences you’ve had and what you’ve from them and less to do with how many birthdays you’ve celebrated.

I’ve learned that you should never tell a child their dreams are unlikely or outlandish. Few things are more humiliating, and what a tragedy it would be if they believed it.

I’ve learned that no matter good a friend is, they’re going to hurt you every once in a while and you must forgive them for that.

I’ve learned that no matter how bad your heart is broken the world doesn’t stop for your grief.

I’ve learned that our background and circumstances may have influenced who we are, but we are responsible for who we become.

I’ve learned that even when you think you have no more to give, when a friend cries out to you, you will find the strength to help.

Author: Unknown

"I found love"

Sun, 26 Jun 2011 20:42:40 -0400

“I found love”

- darling.

A Little Update;

Sun, 26 Jun 2011 20:42:22 -0400

These last two and half weeks have been hell. I worked over 50 hours last week, and it took a toll on me. Saturday I was at work, and ended up passing out in the back hallway on my break. I was dizzy, weak, and had such a massive migraine. I could tell my body was finally saying stop, and I listen. I got sent home from my DM. I didn’t want to go since saturdays are always our biggest days, but I did. I went home and slept ALL day. Sunday I only had to work half a day and it wasn’t too bad so I came home and slept some more. Monday I went back feeling a lot better, not perfect but a lot better than I have been. My DM came in at 9am and STILL sent me home again. This time I argued, but he wasn’t bugging. I ended up going to the doctor at 3 and found out I had a upper respiratory infections and a sinus infection. I guess I was that sick. Tuesday was my day off and all I did was clean my room and sleep. Now I worked Wednesday but nothing exciting happen so now lets skip to Thursday. It was a great day, I was getting so much stuff done and I felt on top of the world until 5:30….30mins before I went home. All this hardware in our back room fell on top of me, but luckily I caught it with my hand. Unfortunately in this process my thumb got intertwined with all these bars and felt like it almost broke in half. I went home right away and came back with a smile on my face and a split on my hand. Again my DM came in, made me fill out a injury report then my HR lady called. I got sent to the doctor straight from work to only wait 4 hours, 3 different xrays, and for the doctor to tell me “I don’t know.” After I was finished I got told I will not get paid for ANY of the time I missed, or even about to missed. Why may you ask, because I didn’t go to the doctor the day of the accident. Even though it was within 24 hours? Oh did I mention how my doctor doesn’t know whats wrong, yet I have to go to physical therapy Mon, Tues, and Wed. Then after it on Wed I have to go back to the doctor? I literally loose ALL my time at work. I am financially on my own, so this fucking sucks. I just want to go to my OWN doctor and pay my OWN bills because then it will be on my own time. So here’s the deal. I may not lift anything, I can not work even 15 mins by myself, and I can’t fold. I basically just stand there. That is just not me, and today I finally worked my first full shift in forever and it felt amazing except that part. I felt worthless. This week has really sucked. I guess this is what you get when you don’t quit?

"My heartbeat is always weakening me."

Wed, 01 Jun 2011 23:46:43 -0400

“My heartbeat is always weakening me.”

- I can’t find the strength within me.

shelby

New tattoos! (Taken with instagram)

I’ve learned that you can keep going long after you can’t.

Austin wiff muh loves (Taken with instagram)

Night time dreams. (Taken with instagram)

Taken with instagram

Beetle juice beetle juice beetle juice (Taken with Instagram at...

10 mins (Taken with instagram)

Sing me to sleep

Hello Dear Friend;

"That moment when you are so scared for what’s going to happen"

hiii(: i just found your blog & i really like it. just everything about it actually, haha. i hope you dont mind me asking , where youre from& your favourite band?

It's been a while;

"I’m sorry I can’t be good enough for you,"

Days Off Goes As Followed;

"These days it’s hard to figure out"

Night Lights;

What I've learned.

"I found love"

A Little Update;

"My heartbeat is always weakening me."

hiii(:
i just found your blog & i really like it. just everything about it actually, haha. i hope you dont mind me asking , where youre from& your favourite band?